From The Daily Dialogue
From The Daily Dialogue
Broadcast of 7/26/98
Subject: [DailyDialogue #205] Heart of Reconciliation
"Are the moments in my hands well-used? That's a question worth asking everyday."
-- Mary Manin Morrisey
Mary's message at the Living Enrichment Center today suggested three important steps to maintaining healthy relationships. Following are those steps with my interpretive comments.
1. Reject the reflex, and choose to conciliate rather than separate.
In our culture, we learn to judge, withhold, and escalate in interpersonal conflict. These tendencies are so prevalent that most people think of them as "human nature." But, these are learned ways of dealing with conflict. We could just as well adopt a strategy to notice the conflict, express our thoughts and feelings, and seek understanding.
2. Move toward the other quickly rather than thinking it over and suffering with the upset.
Waiting builds tension, saps energy, and offers too many opportunities to bring other people into the conflict. Best to approach the other quickly and avoid the cul-de-sac of waiting for them to take the first step.
3. Move toward the other with a heart of reconciliation.
The phrase "heart of reconciliation" means with an intention to reconcile and with the understanding that skill and forgiveness may be required to accomplish the desired reconciliation.
Experiment: Approach someone with whom you are in conflict with a heart of reconciliation.
Affirmation: It is our nature to seek and maintain connection.
The Daily Dialogue is published each day of 1998 by e-mail. Copyright 1998, Eddy Brame and Marty Crouch, All rights reserved.
