From The Daily Dialogue
From The Daily Dialogue
Broadcast of 9/21/98
Subject: [DailyDialogue #264] Undiscussables
"Every thing secret degenerates, even the administration of justice; nothing is safe that does not show how it can bear discussion and publicity."
- Lord Acton
Lord Acton (1834-1902) was a British historian who led English Roman Catholics in their opposition to the doctrine of papal infallibility. Many things that we choose to keep secret are morally undesirable or unethical. As we unveil taboo topics, we learn from them.
Chris Argyris coined the term undiscussables in her book "Overcoming Organizational Defenses." There are many fears that block us from discussing certain topics. Some of the common undiscussable topics in relationships are finances, affairs, sexuality, spirituality, politics, in-laws and personality styles.
What is your greatest fear about these topics? How has not discussing these topics blocked your ability to move ahead in you partnership? What is your vision? What are your values? How might discussing this topic support your vision and values?
Experiment: Write down the undiscussables in you relationship on 3x5 cards. Shuffle the cards and draw them one at a time. Dialogue with your partner about your undiscussables.
Affirmation: I am coming out of hiding, recognizing the safety of being real.
The Daily Dialogue is published each day of 1998 by e-mail. Copyright 1998, Eddy Brame and Marty Crouch, All rights reserved.
