From The Daily Dialogue
From The Daily Dialogue
Broadcast of 9/4/98
Subject: [DailyDialogue #247] Wholeness
"No partner in a love relationship should feel that he has to give up an essential part of himself to make it viable.." - May Sarton
"Your partner's criticisms of you, and their expressed desires, are clues to your lost self", according to Harville Hendrix and Helen Hunt. Sometimes I think I have to be a certain way in order to be loved by Marty. This way of thinking creates a lot of stress.
My attraction to Marty was partly because he possessed traits that I lack. He is less talkative and enjoys being alone. These qualities are parts of myself I can cultivate. I can focus on expressing all parts of myself (including my masculine and feminine parts) rather than worrying about what Marty thinks of me.
When I perform wedding ceremonies, many couples want to have a unity candle lighting. When I conduct this ritual, I recommend that the couple keep their original taper candles lit after they light the large middle Unity Candle. To me this represents that although we come together as one, we do not give up our individual unique selves. I don't have to give up a part of myself to be loved by you.
Experiment: Dialogue about the parts of yourself and which ones you want to nurture to express more of your wholeness.
Affirmation: I am whole and complete.
The Daily Dialogue is published each day of 1998 by e-mail. Copyright 1998, Eddy Brame and Marty Crouch, All rights reserved.
