From The Daily Dialogue
From The Daily Dialogue
Broadcast of 8/10/98
Subject: [DailyDialogue #219] Love Story
"I'm totally fascinated by your first date. I hope you'll do a piece on how both of you knew then that this was going to be THE relationship."
-- a Daily Dialogue Reader
Our first evening date was preceded by two separate lunch times together, several months apart. The first was a self-introduction in which I was attempting to enlist Eddy as a source of referrals for a my coaching practice. I remember thinking that Eddy was unmarried, but probably not available. I was impressed by the way that she had integrated her spirituality into her counseling practice, that she was good in conversation and physically active.
After three months, I called to ask for a second meeting. I had an intuitive prompting that Eddy might soon be available for potential romance. At this brunch, Eddy talked a lot about her dissatisfaction with her ongoing relationship; it was clear that she would soon be available. I kissed her on the cheek as we parted and decided to wait for her to call when a parting with her present partner was worked out.
She called me within the next two weeks and asked me for a date. I invited her to dinner at my house. At the dinner, we spent a lot of time talking about what we wanted in a partnership, danced a West Coast Swing on the carpet, and listenened to music together. On this date we also agreed to enter Imago-style relationship counseling together. We thought it might be a better foundation for a new relationship that we had experienced in the past.
This probably sounds impetuous and reckless. However, there was a lot that we already knew, or thought we knew, about each other:
1. We had each been divorced for nearly 10 years, tried several interim relationships and spent some significant time without a partner.
2. We had both been involved in a significant personal quest for healing and self-strengthening.
3. We shared several interests, such as: psychology, dance, spirituality, outdoor sports, and relating.
4. We both had a relatively healthy life-style and a desire to do outdoor activities in the Northwest.
5. We saw no complicating factors, such as minor children, work demands or unhealthy addictions.
We married one year following our first evening date and moved into our present home together after a glorious honeymoon in French Polynesia.
Experiment: Dialogue with your partner about when you first "knew" that she or he was the one. If you're exploring your partnership, dialogue with your partner about the sort of alliance that you want.
Affirmation: We are free to know with our higher consciousness. The Daily Dialogue is published each day of 1998 by e-mail. Copyright 1998, Eddy Brame and Marty Crouch, All rights reserved.
